the ten worst dieting ideas EVER

I love #4: Eat Cake . and they were  completely serious

http://www.lifescript.com/Body/Diet/Lose-weight/Weird_Weight-Loss_Tips_That_Work.aspx?utm_source=mgid&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=003a%20#2

Sorry, I know this is a bit inappropriate, but I simply couldn't stop it

"shut up you thtupid A-s-s!"-special olympics athlete

I just wanted to know where Syria was....

So I googled Syria because I didn't know where it was in relation to the big picture of the world, and this is one of the first hits on google. Seriously? Why is this exclusive to Syria? I didn't need to see this today. Actually, I don't think there's ever a day when I will find it necessary to view photographs with this particular subject matter: obesity and naked girls. together. Dear god.

Chlorofluorocarbons

A list of long and interesting words:
Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis:  a word alleged to mean 'a lung disease caused by the inhalation of very fine silica dust, causing inflammation in the lungs

HIPPOPOTO­MONSTRO­SESQUIPED­AL­IAN = pertaining to a very long word.

Pseudoantidisestablishmentarianism:  a feigned opposition to the separating of the state from the Church

Blatherskite: This refers to a garrulous talker of nonsense. It is normally used in the pejorative manner to describe fish wives discussing the vicar’s legs and the price of eggs.

Alectryomachy

means

Cock-fighting

Defenestrate

means

To Eject or Throw from a Window

bingo tease :

a person who claims to have bingo but does not

Person A: "BINGO!"
Person B: (looks at bingo card) I did not call O 69
All other players: "SHES SUCH A BINGO TEASE!"

nomonym :

When you eat something and it tastes like something else. Things often taste like chicken but chicken rarely tastes like other things.

"This tuna tastes just like your mom."
"Dude, that's a nomonym!"

book google :

When you need to figure out something, so you look it up in a book, like in the olden times, when dinosaurs ruled the earth.

Guy 1: Quick! What's the definiton of "callow?"
Guy 2: I don't know! My iPhone 4 doesn't get signal here!
Guy 3: Book google that shit!

 

mae:

mae is a costarrican word for dud, man or yo

mae,mae stop that!!!
what is up mae ?

 

Moon Kitty

A rather large event happened today in the life of Shelby: I finished a tube of deodorant! That never happens! Have you ever heard anyone say "Man, I just ran out of deodorant. I better go to the store to buy some more?" NO! You don't! You hear such things as "Man, where's my deodorant? Crap. Better go to the store to buy some." or "Man, I lost my deodorant in our house fire. Better go to the store to buy some more along with the other household necessities since I lost them in our house fire. Crap." You know, something like that. I had forseen my eventual need for more deodorant, so I believe I invested in a Dove deodorant which I am excited to whip out tomorrow morning bright and early. So, needless to say, I am feeling somewhat accomplished today. It makes up for my lack of motivation to start/finish my ed. protfolio that is due on Friday.
Well, I think it would be important and appropriate to mention that today is the first day of autumn- my favorite season. It didn't get a good kick off, though. It was much too humid and cloudy. Also, I like it when the leaves change color and they have yet to do it within the first 24 hours, so I am somewhat dissappointed.  I am tempted to pick a tree, go out with my red, orange, yellow and brown paints and just paint it. May get a bit tetious after the 400th leaf, though.  I will re-evaluate my desire.
Speaking of desires, I need to re-evaluate a crap-ton of desires in my life. Ready? I will do some major thinking on Friday. I just can't bear it all right now. Speaking of right now, I am not feeling very well. I think I will go to bed and hammer out my portfolio tomorrow...all. day. long. Crap.  I'll write to you soon, Kitty. Love you.

A dumb day

http://features.peta2.com/hug/pledge.aspx?c=peta2_enews


September 24 is 'Hug a Vegetarian Day'. To me, this seems like a rather exhausting effort. Not only do you have to find out who the vegetarians are (it's not like is blatantly obvious) but then you have to go through the physical effort of giving them a hug. God I can't believe they even went through the whole effort of making an entire website devoted to the simple fact of giving someone a hug. Notice how people can even pledge. This is getting complicated. 

ok again

With the vid below, watch from 7:12 to like 9:40. You will chuckle. multiple times.

ok.....

ok, i just discovered the stupidest thing I think I have seen in a super long time. You tube videos of people re-capping Jersey Shore episodes. For real? After watching 14 minutes youtube vids of senseless talking by stupid people trying to tell me about what's going on with other stupid people, i mays as well just watch the freakin episode. The youtube vids are like double/triple dosing on stupidity. Although to be honest, I kinda like watching stupid people, so a part of me thinks this ain't so bad. Example: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ks_dzjG6HE8. I cannot believe the stupidity of this video. The end.

why?

Why am I so unsatisfied with life lately? Why all the thoughts circumnavigating the globe that is my brain. What the hell are we all doing here? What is the meaning of life? Turns out there's a whole Wikipedia page on it. But who has time or energy to read that? Seriously. Not me. There is also a website called meaningsoflife.com. Seriously? Do people get paid to write these websites? Because I feel like we could totally collaborate and make a super gay website full of dumb information that people would totally eat up. Hell, maybe that's where we could eventually aim Dear Kitty to be at. Like a long term goal: become a legit website where we do all the work for all those cat lovers and people who basically like reading what's going on in other people's lives that they don't even know. Oh and not only is there a meaningsoflife.com, but there is also a themeaningoflife.org. The .org site claims that "soon you will understand". Whatever the hell that means. If you click on the button you can read a "brief generic overview of why you are here, what your experience is all about and what it all means." What the hell? We don't even get the name brand version? We have to settle for the generic? Although sometimes the generic is better than the name brand I will give them that credit. Example: Rainbow Food's brand, "Roundy's" semi-sweet chocolate chips taste 5000000000000 times better than Hersheys or Nestle. And they're way cheaper! Score! I'm trying to catch up on Jersey Shore. I'm on episode 4 but MTV isn't streaming episode 4 right now so I am left wondering whether Ronnie and Sammie will actually break up and whether Angelina will be mad at Pauly D, Vinny and The Situation for ditching her the other night to go creepin'. The life I tell you, the life.

whoops, forgot a kitty pic

GTL: The Regional Differences

Though I have never had a first hand encounter with the ever popular Jersey Shore, I frequently come in contact with the abbreviation "GTL" standing for 'gym, tanning, laundry'.  This mantra used by The Situation (recently elected to Dancing with the Stars) and Snookie, along with their co-stars, determines the happenings of their everyday life.  As some may stereotype the entire East coast now as a people solely focused on self-gratification, washboard abs, Gucci and orange skin, I venture to argue this stereotype.  Naturally, a stereotype never fulfills the generalization of an entire region and in this, I bring forth an example from a new primetime reality series, Rio Grande Shore.  Based in my hometown, this new series is based on the same abbreviation, "GTL," but stands for something much different: 'Ghetto Thug Life." No one really knows what this entails except for the thugs directly involved. The very fact that I, a native, do not know exactly what this means, breaks the stereotypical regional mantra.  Welcome to the Ghetto Gym run by Tanning Thugs where we celebrate the Laundry Life!

I'm getting kind of carried away

Had to add these in

*use this one as an educational tool in your Diversity Club!*

*the mantra of a douchebag-GTL-Gym, Tanning, Laundry <insert fist pump>*

*I imagine there being something like this somewhere's in Atchison....*

aaand a couple more purrrty good vids

Stealth Cat: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fzzjgBAaWZw
Watch this first: 'Kittens inspired by Kittens': http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FtX8nswnUKU&feature=related
Then this, 'Kitten's inspired by Barack Obama': http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zJHL7jcU2-g

kitt

I laughed really hard last night when I had a sleepover with my lil bro John and he was telling me this story about his carpool where this crazy 1st grade chick in his carpool named Mary had a tantrum and the mom driving the carpool had to pull over and then Mary decided to play a little game of catch-me-if-you-can with the mom and hop from the trunk to the front of the car to the trunk to the front and the mom kept on going back and forth, back and forth too. I guess this little Mary has freakouts quite frequently. I told John that one day he should just turn to Mary in the middle of one of her outbursts, cross his eyes slightly, stick out his tongue slightly and say with a slight lisp "I like ith cream". That should stop her dead in her tracks.
Aaaand the Kitty picture of the day goes to:

Also a link to one of my favorite vids: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fBA_lxUiwSg

Stereotyping in the Diversity Committee: Mexi-cats

While studying the Art of education, one often is required to take such classes that introduce and discuss the prospect of diversity within the nation and within the classroom.  As one of Hispanic descent, I used to look forward to learning the ways of equality in these classes. To my dismay, this is just the opposite of what happens in these classes.  Rather, I feel like the center of attention most days as my professors put me on the spot asking questions such as "Shelby, how do Mexican Americans deal with personal space issues?" and "Shelby, how do you celebrate Dia de los Muertos?"  Well I usually like to respond with some smart ass sarcastic response such as "Well, we Mexicanos don't really have a personal bubble or a problem with people in close proximity" or "Well, in my family, we dance around graves and sing to our ancestors while eating some 'Dead Bread.'"  On the contrary, I do have a personal bubble and do not like it when people initiate the touching, though I don't mind it if I initiate the contact. Also, I do not personally celebrate Dia de los Meurtos. No one in my extended family does.  If we go back four generations or so, maybe, just maybe our ancestors celebrated this day, but not with dance and 'Dead Bread' (which is a real thing- it's like Friendship Bread, but for a Mexican holiday celebrating our dead friends...and family....mostly our family...).  Nonetheless, I am still a part of the Diversity Committee and today during Club Fair, I joined O.L.A.S (Organization of Latin American Students). Clever, huh? I didn't come up with the name, but I find it appropriate.  In Spanish, 'olas' are 'waves' in English.  I don't know what the significance of waves is, though. Maybe we will learn to surf in Latin American club.  Wishful thinking.

And then I found 5 dollars (ok, well it was actually only 1...)

It's true, I found a dollar today on the ground at the bus stop. Good thing I decided to take the bus. Not only for that reason, it also started raining a lot outside during class. Glad I won't have to bike back in that misery. I also watched a movie in Anthropology today called Clever Monkeys. It was a ridiculous movie, complete with slow mo shots and dramatic music accompanying monkeys doing normal, everyday activities like eating and sleeping. And then they try to tell me that if I had lived millions of years ago I would have been a monkey. I think they needed all those drama shots and music just to make me feel ok with my roots. Like to give us humans a sort of dignity and respect that we deserve coming from our not as sophisticated relatives= the apes. And yes, it was narrated by a guy with a british accent. I think the most hilarious part though was when it was all over and the guy in front of me turns to his friend behind him and is like "damn, that was just like watching the discovery channel". Like no shit! What a great observation! I was kind of wondering where I had scene movies like that before....Man, I am so grateful my classes are filled with all sorts of academics like him. They really shed light on the big questions of life. Scary. Let me enlighten you a bit here before I wrap things up. I found this great pic of one of our early ancestors. I believe he is one of the first known mathemeticians of the early ape turning human culture. I'm guessing he was definitely a member of one of the earliest known Math clubs.

And looks like cats are the only psychotics out there:

In honor of this rainy day

Forgot to post a daily Kitty pic

I came to dance dance dance dance.

A few facts about men to reflect upon:

How do men sort their laundry? “Filthy” and “Filthy but Wearable.”
I had a recent experience with this yesterday when I was hanging out with Blake Maly among other men and women.  He was wearing a yellow and brown plaid flannel shirt.  Liz Schmitz (his girlfriend) noted that he had worn the same shirt the day before.  Another young man replied saying that not only had Blake worn the shirt the day before, but Marcus had the day before that and two other guys had worn it in previous weeks without it being washed since then. 

What is the thinnest book in the world? What Men Know About Women.
The end.

So today was somewhat eventful. I found out that Jesse is dating Leslie Naden, a girl I lived with last year. I am happy about this.  It takes some pressure off of me because now I can really do nothing about it.  Also, I found out that Josh has a girlfriend which could give me some reason as to why he is such an ass.  Not because of her, of course, but because he is just so preoccupied with her.  I found this link which I would love to perform one day:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HkHJ2-zoSB4&feature=topvideos.  I took a fake engagement picture with DAC and people are buying inot it which is so fun!  I sang at Mass with 4 new people which was an adventure. Also, I had a bit of congestion which wasn't so fun.  I stole a key to St. Joseph Hall and will be wreking havoc soon in there.  I scheduled a double date with Nick Porretta as my date, Kael (my staffie) and DAC (Demetrius A Cain- a fellow RA in the Joe). I took a fake picture of DAC proposing to me, posted it on facebook and changed my status to "It finally happened. Demetrius A Cain".  So far about 5 people have responded with questions. Doing pretty well, I'd say.  It is now 2am and I have yet to start homework for tomorrow/today. Also I'm anticipating a beginnig of the year fire drill tonight...We'll see...

In other news, Wednesday this week begins the month long celebration of Hispanic Heritage Month. Get Excited!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh, and can I also mention that it is apparently International Burn a Koran Day? Here's a link to the article. http://news.yahoo.com/s/yblog_upshot/20100908/pl_yblog_upshot/even-pastors-old-church-condemns-quran-burning. Notice how the sign manages to spell Koran wrong. So that leaves me wondering, well maybe a Koran is something different and people are misinterpreting this event. Well, upon second thought, the notion of burning anything actually sounds pretty brutal, so regardless, it's a sad day for Korans, whatever they are.

I wanted a cool name for this second post, but couldn't think of one, so this is it.

So I'm sitting here thinking of what special things to commemorate in this here blog. As I munch on my white cheddar rice cake, it comes to me!- Nothing. Nothing comes to me. Not to say that my day or life is boring, but simply and very simply Nothing.  There is, however, a notable artifact in my immediate surroundings that I deem necessary to mention, especially in accordance with this blog.  The RD of Ferrell Hall, Jenny Carter, is an avid lover of cats, or so it seems.  I infer this from her two mousepads.  One, the bottom one, is the normal pad with the Dell symbol, but right on top of it is a mouse pad with four kittens.  MAE! I just found the exact picture of it on Google images (please see the bottom of this page).  This is very concerning to me. She. has. two. mousepads. one of which has kittens. 

Well I guess in this post, we should take a moment of silence for the events that happened 9 whole years ago on this day.  Dang. We went on our RA retreat last night and this morning we were eating a continental breakfast and watching tv.  On NBC, they were playing their whole coverage of the story from nine years ago.  Abbie Allena and I watched it for almost an hour. It was intense. Where were you? I was in 7th grade in Religion class with Sr. Eileen when we were all sent home. They were really nervous about Albuquerque because we have some national labs in town that do very secretive stuff.  It sounds really bad, but I remember one thing I was thinking that day was that it would have sucked to have a birthday on 9.11 because no body would even care about it. I was a messed up child. I still am.

 

Purrrrty excited about this new blog!!!

Well, just thought I'd get this thing off the ground.
Ghaha....I feel like barfing right now. I'm at a coffee shop right now. There's no wireless at my new home at Warwick Street so I am at a nearby coffee shop buying the cheapest thing on the menu and using the wireless for hours. Wow I'm an ass sometimes. Anyways, back to the nausea. I have the strange fortune of sitting near a group therapy session. Not even lying. Right out in the open, three women sitting in a circle with a huge drawing pad propped up on the table with charts and notes on them to aid in the therapy. It's kind of like an Alcoholics Anonymous group I think. Their topic for today: forgiveness. Anyways, I feel like barfing because all of the stuff they are talking about in relation to solving their problems and finding peace and happiness is basically a bunch of feel-good shit and creepy, abstract metaphors that are supposed to aid in coming to a better understanding of what is troubling them. I've been keeping some casual notes just for the fun of it. Here's some info I've learned, enlightenment, as they like to see it. Judge for themselves.

Also what's pissing me off is that the lady who is leading the group (aka, the "therapist" blah blah blah) relays information as if she is the all-knowing way to coming to forgiveness with oneself. Seriously, she has been talking non-stop for the past hour. She barely lets the other people who need the help talk. This one lady keeps on trying to budge in with her stories and problems, but each time the leader lady interrupts her with her knowlege, how she knows how to fix it.


1. it is highly recommended to check out stepstoforgiveness.com
2. we need to let go of negative energy
3. If you don't have a bucket big enough to hold what you have or what you do, then your bucket will overflow
4. procrastination is nothing than putting off feeling better; you will only feel better once you face that which you are running away from; we have to train ourselves not to run, we have to train ourselves to embrace
5. we have to open our trapdoors and let our bad stuff out
6. things to help solve our problems: journal, yoga, therapy sessions
7. take the shattered part of yourself into the light of the present moment!
[oh whoops! this is NOT therapy. The head talker wise sage lady of the group just dissed therapy and said how it doesn't really work....sooo idk what they r calling this whole shindig...]
8. "THAt was your divine intuitive self telling you that!"; 
9. We are all connected to a universal energy; this universal energy does not promote capitalism or consumerism
10. consumerism is going to crumble
11. Imagine your space being protected by this white light of love



This meeting is going on for freaking forever and I'm sick of it frankly so I'm gonna check out and listen to itunes again.